I’m going to place you on a brief hold…you will hear music. 

Me: Okay

{15 mins later}

Hi Sir, you still with me?

Me: ah, oh Hi, yup.

Okay I need to put you back on a brief hold again.

Me: please don’t 
{too late, she already did}
{back to listening to stupid music}
{10 minutes later}

Sir, okay we need to escalate this to a top level representative.

Me: I thought I was dealing with a top level representative.

No Sir, I needed to keep putting you on hold so I could talk to them about your issue.

Me: So I just wasted over 30 minutes on hold for you to be a go between?

Yes Sir, but I am qualified to answer most questions.

Me: Just not mine apparently.

Sir, do you want this resolved?

Me: I don’t know, how long will I need to be placed on hold again?

{they hung up}

Brief hold times should not exceed a few minutes. And by a few minutes I mean five at most. Not ten. Not fifteen. Not broken down into multiple hold times where the customer calling is forced to listen until their ears bleed. NO! If after 5 minutes of holding, tell the customer you will investigate and call them back when you have the answer.