Well that was 20 minutes of my life I am never getting back.
Thank you Google for the most asinine, patronizing, totally non-sensical, cluster fudge of a phone call one can have with your call center.
Called to resolve why 41 of my client’s reviews suddenly vanished and the answers they gave were beyond stupid.
“The AI algorithm now determines what is and isn’t a good review” – so at the mercy of a free thinking computer.
“The reviews might have been received too close together” – what is the time frame that determines how close reviews should come in?
“The person leaving a review is doing so for the first time so it raises a red flag.” – yet Google encourages us to ask clients to leave a review
“Certain words which go against our community standards might trigger the algorithm and be removed.” – and yet, they have no idea what those words are.
“The system hasn’t caught up yet, so check back in a few days.” – Caught up? These were reviews that just vanished. This is a not a game of catch-up, its a game of the system being too lazy to do its job.
“The system is location based so if a review came in outside the service area of the business it won’t be recognized.” – These were reviews all in the same service area and every single one was a customer. So this statement is invalid like the rest.
So after I countered every excuse they could muster…they simply said “check back in a few days, maybe it’ll fix itself.”
Yeah, maybe.
But I doubt it.
Rob is affectionately known as “Mr. Sarcasm” to his friends - to everyone else he’s a Certified Digital Marketing Strategist, a Foremost Expert On Specialized SEO, a Best Selling Author, Podcaster, Speaker and Authority Broadcaster who can help amplify YOU to your audience.
Rob has authored, coauthored or produced over 40 books covering social media, search engine optimization, podcasting, copywriting, personal injury law, weight loss, military law, life lessons, scams, sarcasm, customer service and more. His book clients include lawyers, speakers, doctors, real estate professionals and more.
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