Phone rings…caller ID says it’s a Spam Risk.
Pfft…I answer it anyway.

Me: Hello
{recorded message says it’s an apology call from my electric company and I qualify for a rebate…so I should press 1 to speak to a representative} So I did.

Them: Sir am I to assume you are the one on the electric and gas bill?

Me: Well I did answer the call.

Them: Am I speaking to Mr. Stafford?

Me: {not wanting to disappoint} Of course.

Them: Sir, we are offering a 30% rebate on your electric and gas and issuing a refund for overpayment. 

Me: How nice.

Them: Mr Stafford would you agree to share your statement with me so I can look up your account.

Me: Share my statement, don’t you already have it?

Them: Sir, we just need to double check the information.

Me: Well I don’t need it double checked, just go ahead and issue the refund and apply the 30% discount to my account.

Them: Sir we need the information.

Me: You already have it. 

Them: Sir I assure you we don’t.

Me: Yeah I’ll have to agree with you on that.

Them: Sir, what do you mean.

Me: The information you have is wrong. Way wrong.

Them: What do you mean wrong?

Me: I’m not Mr Stafford. 

Them: Why did you say you were then?

Me: Why not? You lied first.

Them: Sir, I assure you we are legitimate service.

Me: Hmm, legitimate at ripping people off and stealing their information. 

Them: F-You.

Me: Do you even know who I am?

Them: You just said you are not Mr Stafford.

Me: That’s right. And yet you continue to let me keep you on the line. 

Them: Benchod {Pakistan & Indian bad word}

Me: So I take it no refund and you aren’t from the electric company?

Them: F-You.

Me: You must me new.

Them: Huh?

Me: An experienced scammer would have hung up long ago, but thanks for allowing me to waste your time. 

{I hung up}

{He calls back – I transfer him to voicemail – he leaves a message telling me to F-off}

Rob is affectionately known as “Mr. Sarcasm” to his friends - to everyone else he’s a Certified Digital Marketing Strategist, a Foremost Expert On Specialized SEO, a Best Selling Author, Podcaster, Speaker and Authority Broadcaster who can help amplify YOU to your audience.

Rob has authored, coauthored or produced over 40 books covering social media, search engine optimization, podcasting, copywriting, personal injury law, weight loss, military law, life lessons, scams, sarcasm, customer service and more. His book clients include lawyers, speakers, doctors, real estate professionals and more.

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