Me: Hmm, could you repeat that, all the noise in the background is distracting.

Caller: Sir, we are a Home Improvement Company offering all kinds of repairs like roofing, gutters, windows, doors and plumbing.

Me: What did you say your company’s name is?

Caller: Home Improvement Company

Me: Hmm, never heard of you, what is it you do?

Caller: All kinds of home repairs like roof, gutters, windows, doors and plumbing.

Me: Do you offer electrical?

Caller: Yes

Me: Do you offer siding replacement?

Caller: Yes

Me: Do you offer dog poo yard clean up?

Caller: Sir, you name it we can fix it.

Me: Okay, I can probably come up with a list of repairs you can MacGyver

Caller: Do you own your home?

Me: I pay a mortgage – which means I will probably be dead before it’s paid for.

Caller: So in the future which repairs do you think you will need done to your home?

Me: It’s a home…everything will need repaired at some point.

Caller: May we send someone out tomorrow to give you a quote?

Me: Where did you say you are located?

{Caller then botches the name of my town}

Me: So if you’re local to my area how come you can’t even pronounce the town’s name correctly?

Caller: I’m new to the company.

Me: So you work for a company that has no real name in a town you cant pronounce

{caller doesn’t even acknowledge my question and stays on script}

Caller: So tomorrow doesn’t work, how about the next day?

Me: You’re a pushy SOB aren’t you?

Caller: Sir, we are just trying to make an appointment with you

Me: To do what?

Caller: Give you a quote for repairs

Me: Well you asked if I needed repairs in the future, not if I needed repairs right now.

Caller: But Sir we are in your area all this week.

Me: Well the number you called in on is not a local number

Caller: We are calling from our national call center and we make thousands of calls a day all over the USA

Me: Wow, sounds like you have this scam down then.

Caller: Yes Sir

Me: So you admit it?

{Caller hung up}