Ronnie: I need to ask you a set of questions to see if you qualify?

Me: Ask away

Ronnie: Do you currently use a walker or a cane?

Me: Yes Johnny Walker with some sugar cane.

Ronnie: That’s wonderful. Do you currently live alone?

Me: Hmm, are going to stop over and keep me company?

Ronnie: Based on your answers I believe you qualify.

Me: Oh goody.

Ronnie: Do you understand what we are offering?

Me: A subscription to the scammer of the month club?

Ronnie: It’s a medical alert that you use anywhere in the USA and Canada.

Me: How about Mexico?

Ronnie: The system only works in the USA and Canada

Me: How about Europe?

Ronnie: The system only works in the USA and Canada

Me: Well what if I’m in Australia

Ronnie: The system only works in the USA and Canada

Me: How about if I’m in Karachi, Pakistan near your call center.

{a slight pause, then I hear a clicking sound followed by a foreign accented male voice who says…}

F*ck You A-Hole why you waste our time?

Me: So I take it I’m not getting the Free Medical Alert System

Scammer: Bhenchod {foreign curse word}

Me: Yeah well…you too buddy.

Scammer: F YOU!
{he finally hung up

Protect yourself against scams…read  “Rob Versus The Scammers”