By Rob Anspach

Rob Versus The Unicorns

Repelling The Mystical, Malevolent And Borderline Idiotic With Spells Of Sarcasm, Wit & Humor.

“There is a famous cartoon in which two unicorns miss their ride on Noah’s Ark, exclaiming “Wait…that was today?” I believe Telemarketers and Scammers are the descendants of those unicorns, and they are still upset. And Rob Anspach may actually be the exponential-great-great-grand-nephew of Noah. That’s why his phone keeps ringing. This book is out there NOW, my unicorn friends. Get your copy before it starts raining. Come aboard, grab a Vanilla Iced-Coffee and a grilled-cheese, and settle in for a laugh filled journey that could last 40 days and 40 nights…if you read slowly enough.”

~ Steve Gamlin – The Motivational Firewood™ Guy

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Rob Versus The Unicorns

Unicorns Beware…

Your mythical behaviors are no match for the power of sarcasm.

“It’s Saturday night and I’m reading another book by Mr. Sarcasm himself, Rob Anspach. In my mind I can hear each of Rob’s conversations with these nefarious actors who call him on a daily basis. I can relate to every interaction he has with these scoundrels trying desperately to steal, cajole and abscond with private information and your hard earned money. I’ve been there trying to come up with witty retorts to the ‘car warranty’ guy, the ‘solar power’ guy, the LinkedIn guy sending off an obnoxious email 3 seconds after connecting with him, the IM guy who expects an answer the moment he hits send. None of my replies match the witty (and funny) sarcasm that Rob reveals in his conversations with these unsuspecting callers (often with foreign accents), doing their scripted best to get him to hand over his social security number, his address and his birthdate. What they don’t realize is that Rob is a pro at wasting their time and helping save poor hapless souls from being scammed by these unscrupulous people. 

If you want to laugh, smile and say “I wish I had said that,” I encourage you to read this book. Then, make sure you get the whole Rob Versus collection. I did and then gave it to my daughter to read and laugh about. Now she is learning how to scam the scammers just like Rob. Read the whole Rob Versus collection and then get another one for your best friend’s birthday. They will thank you for it and so will Rob!” – Gerry Oginski

“I’ve enjoyed every book Rob Anspach has ever written. ‘Rob Versus The Unicorns’ is another in a long line of informative, funny and sarcastic ones. But read it carefully because, although it would be a good script for a stand-up comedian, it is filled with truisms that are applicable to many aspects of life!” Ben Gay III, Author of “The Closers”

“I have to be careful when I read anything Rob writes. I make sure I’m not drinking or eating because I know I won’t be able to contain the laughter. Oh sure, initially I’m lulled into thinking these chuckles and a few giggles will be all I experience. Then there’s that one line – out of nowhere – completely unexpected – that forces me into a belly laugh. The snark and sarcasm is alive and well in this book and I, for one, am looking forward to the next book that strikes blood pumping anxiety into the heart of every telemarketer, phone scammer, and newbie to social selling who blindly follows bad coaching advice. Charlene Burke

“Been reading Rob Anspach’s latest book, Rob Vs the Unicorns. If you are in any sort of business, online or off, if you deal with customers, if you have a phone, if you are still breathing… run to your nearest book store and grab a copy. Whenever you feel like the turkeys are winning, this book and Rob will bring a smile to your lips, a lightness to your step and proof that justice is indeed served. Rob’s stories are full of humor and insights, a powerful combination. And hopefully, you’ll start firing clients who are PITA’s a lot sooner, too!” Scott Paton, Podcast Director & Course Creator

Grab your copy of Rob Versus The Unicorns and enjoy the breath of sarcastic air you’ll soon experience. 

Best Selling Author

Rob Anspach

Rob Anspach (aka Mr Sarcasm) exposes the shenanigans of scammers, time wasters, fraudsters, fools and lousy customer service with his sarcastic take on how the world should really work. Every book is jam packed full of humorous, laugh out loud stories that ultimately teach a valuable lesson. Unfortunately, those in the stories usually find they miscalculated who Rob is and don’t know what to do with his sarcasm, which makes the stories even funnier.

Other Books

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Social Media For The Boomers, Gen X-ers & the Over 50 Entrepreneur

Rob Versus The Morons

Overcoming Idiotic Customers With Wit, Sarcasm and a Take No Bullshit Attitude

Power Guesting

Insider Secrets To Profit From Being A Great Podcasting Guest

Wise Guys Copywriting Handbook

How To Create Marketing Messages And Offers They Just Can’t Refuse

Rob Versus The Whackadoos

Conquering Ridiculous Attitudes and Scammy Behaviors With Lightning Fast Wit & Shearing Sarcasm.

I had to stop reading after 5 chapters because I couldn’t see the pages from the tears of laughter pouring out of my eyes.

– Allan Gaskamp


It seems like you’ve somehow hit a mythical level, where you manage to attract some of the dumbest people in the world.

– Manny Wolfe


Bigger! Bolder! Funnier! Rob has angered every call center from Dubai to Portland. Once again, I’m laughing my you know what off!

– Brad Szollose

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